Monday, November 3, 2008

Interesting night

I had a bit of a breakdown tonight :(
We went to visit some friends that were just blessed with twin girls at 33.5 weeks on Friday. Jennell spent 6 weeks in the hospital, in my room none the less and needless to say it's been a little surreal being on the flip side of bed rest and the birth of preemies. Tonight we walked into the NICU to meet their beautiful girls, Adrianna and Gabrielle... I have been back into the NICU, but only into the waiting area, not into the actual baby area. We walked right up to Adrianna's isolette to find one of our favorite nurses weighing a 3lb baby in what was once Emma's *spot*, I lost it. Everything just brought me back; the smell of the soap, the lighting, the people, the location. I did a really good job holding it in, because that moment wasn't about me, it was about 2 beautiful new babies, but once I was in the car the tears started coming. Wow. I'm not sure what was worse, reliving my memories or knowing what Jennell will experience in the next couple days; having to leave the hospital while the girls stay, the ups and downs of the NICU, not really feeling like a mom. My heart just breaks for both of them. Luckily the girls are doing great and should be home within weeks :)

In other happy baby news congratulations to my friend Steph on her beautiful son Ryan and my friend Julie on her twins Logan and Lily :)

And a picture to end the day :)


Matthew & April said...

I cannot imagine all the thoughts that went through your head being in the NICU again, but I'm sure you went home and snuggled with your sweet little girl. HUGS and thoughts & prayers to your friend!

Tanya said...

Sending lots of love towards you and your friend's families. xoxoxoxo!

Jeff and Kerry said...

(((hugs))) And congrats to all of the new babies and parents!!!

Anonymous said...

Ivory - you just made me cry reading this! Todd and I couldn't have survived the last 7 weeks without your support and we are so thankful. I can't even imagine how hard it must have been to be in there again. It has been hard enough just being one week in to this!! You are so blessed to have such a wonderful little girl and I look up to you every day knowing how strong you were during Emma's time in the NICU. Jennell