Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Prayers

A friend I know from my online preemie community lost her son last night.

Sam's Story

Sam was an amazing little boy and an inspiration to everyone who knew his story. If you could keep his parents and brother in your thoughts right now I would truly appreciate it, no one should feel the pain the are experiencing right now.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

discomfort


How uncomfortable I feel is still difficult for me to talk about "out loud." I obviously brought this on myself and am very happy to be pregnant, especially this pregnant, that I do feel bad complaining when I know that the flip side is that I'm not pregnant right now. But I'm pretty uncomfortable.
I'd been told many times that the last 6 weeks suck and then the last 3 weeks suck even more, and I am definitely starting to feel it (6 weeks left tomorrow!!). It's HOT here. Tonight at 7pm it was still 90* and that is just too hot. This morning we hit the farmers' market at 9am to "beat the heat", and by 9:45 I was wiped. And I know it's just going to get worse. My body hurts in places that I didn't really know existed. Baby girl has decided that she loves to shove her hand in the crease between my leg and stomach, even though there isn't really room for it there and when I'm sitting that hurts. Her movements are definitely different now, it's so weird to watch her move around in there, because we can see a lot of it. My stomach is off to the side, almost under my arm and when it growls, that is really weird. Also it can only hold about an english muffin before I'm too full and food starts to come back up. My back is killing me, my feet are swelling and did I mention how hot it is?
Don't get me wrong, I am very VERY glad to still be pregnant and I will take whatever discomfort is thrown my way because I know what the alternative is, but I guess I didn't really expect to feel this way. I don't think I ever truly believed that I would still be pregnant at this point and when people talked to me about how uncomfortable things were at the end I blew them off because they were "lucky" to still be pregnant and I didn't want to hear them complain. And now it's my turn to b!tch about the end and it feels pretty good :)


And a small video of Emma telling the baby a story :)

Monday, June 13, 2011

32 weeks!!




Less than 2 months to go! For some reason 32 weeks seems very pregnant to me. I’m not sure if it’s because it was our next milestone with Emma, that obviously never was met, or if there is another reason, but 32 weeks is the real deal!
I’m feeling pretty good, sleep has become an issue because my hip and shoulder start hurting after laying on them for about 30 seconds, but there isn’t really another way to lay so I guess the pain will stick around for a while. Baby girl is definitely calmer than Emma so far, which is kind of nice and I hope continues, she moves but nothing like Emma did. Jamie and I were able to feel her heartbeat through my skin the other night which was so weird and awesome and she has the hiccups pretty frequently these days (Emma did too around that age). My appointment and ultrasound isn’t until Thursday this week, so hopefully I’ll have pictures of her to share then.
And since I haven’t shared an Emma story in a while -
Last night at the dinner table I was showing Jamie where I thought various parts of the baby were positioned. Emma asked some questions about it and so I was telling her a story about how she used to push her butt up against my belly button and wiggle it around. Then she proceeds to tell me that she used to cry in my belly because she didn't like it in there and wanted out so the reason she was wiggling her butt around was because she was trying to push her way out of my stomach so she could be free.
Jamie and I were SHOCKED! While we are very honest with her about her rocky start, we've never really made mention of her coming early (we mainly just discuss the NICU like it's a normal thing all kids need at this point) and I've never told her that mommy's body wasn't a good place for her so she had no choice but to come early (I firmly believe she realized my body was failing her and "kicked" her way out before she was in distress).
It was just so crazy to hear her verbalize things that I've thought but have never discussed with her.